Growing kids look up to their parents to adopt habits and good things in life. It depends on the parents how they develop their children’s confident character to speak their minds.
The moment you interrupt your 5-year old telling the school stories happily, wanting to grab your attention, it’s at that second he will notice you’re not happy with his talking. What will happen next?
He will stop sharing them with you! Next? He might even stop sharing them at all.
Building the confidence of your children starts at a very young age. It may sound complicated and challenging, but no, it’s not. Here are 4 wonderful tips you can try now to build your child’s confidence.
1. Know When to Praise and When to Scold
A simple appreciation goes a long way. (In front of others? Perfect!)
Now, some of you might say it looks like you’re bragging about your kids in front of others, right? We say, why not? They’re your precious gems, after all. The thing to ponder is how you do it. So, don’t ever over exaggerate. Your kids might be young, but they clearly understand when you don’t mean what you say.
Here are some of the alternatives for your usual appreciation phrases.
- Say, “Your sense of colors is admirable” instead of, “You are good at drawing.”
- Say, “I am so proud that you did it” instead of, “Good job.”
- Say, “You are such a responsible kid to complete your homework on time” instead of, “finally, you did it.”
- Say, “I am glad you helped me out. I really needed it” instead of, “Thank you.”
You must praise their good deeds and habits in front of a crowd, but what you should never do is scold them or shame them publicly. Nothing can make your kids lose confidence and feel ashamed than to get insulted in front of others.
2. Let Them Have Their ‘Me-Time’
‘Stick to the kids like glue’ is the biggest mistake most parents make while raising their children. Sure, they need your presence in their lives while growing up, but it doesn’t suggest you take up all of their time that could have helped them be a better and confident person otherwise.
Here are some fun ideas you can use with which your kids can have their ‘me-time’ and ‘growth-time’ in one go.
- Surprise them with their most-awaited bicycle to teach them their patience has a reward.
- Buy the unique and playful kids toy wall climbing car (check prices on sites like Inspire Uplift) to see the excitement on their faces.
- Get them coloring and sketching books to awake the artist in them.
- Let them play video games to have them understand the importance of coordination.
- Provide them with fun-to-match puzzles to build their concentration skills.
- Allow them to watch documentaries, movies, or cartoons on the television to learn new things.
Introduce little life lessons into their lives from a young age to merge them with their personalities as they grow.
3. Don’t Make “No, You Can’t” Your Everyday Sentence
‘No’ is the 56th common word used in the English vocabulary.
Your kid is asking you if he can sleep 10 minutes late today because tomorrow is the no-school day, and you answer with a strict “No, you can’t” or “No, It’s your bed-time.”
Or,
Your 9-year old is insisting you make her a chicken sandwich for breakfast instead of the usual bread and egg. Again your answer with a “No honey, let’s make it some other day.”
These simple situations may sound normal to you but, in reality, you are making your children habitual of hearing “No” from you to whatever they ask.
Sure, you have to set some restrictions not to spoil them, but over-limitations can do them more harm than good. There are times when you should say no, and there are times when you should be lenient with your decisions.
Here are some of the situations when you should confidently say ‘No.’
- If they are putting their efforts into the wrong thing
- If they are behaving like a spoiled brat over a glass of milk
- If they demand your help just for the sake of them not having to do it
- If they are adopting a bad habit
Here are some of the situations when you should avoid saying ‘No.’
- If your kid is asking for a 15-minute sleep relaxation on a Sunday morning
- If you want another dress for her but she prefers a skirt
- When your kid is sharing what he thinks regarding a problem
4. Give them the Power of Making Decisions
Trust your children. You know them more than everybody else.
Over-protective parents are the ones that ask, ‘why is my kid like that?’, ‘why he doesn’t speak?’ ‘why does my child lacks self-confidence?’
Well, sorry to burst your perfect parenting bubble, but if your kid is facing problems to express his opinion, you’re the reason he is like that. How can you play a role in building your child’s personality?
Here are some of the ideas you can use to give your kid confidence and decision-making power.
- Give them options to choose from
- Ask their opinion in your decisions (not the ones above their understanding)
- Allow them to make mistakes (not anything harmful to others)
- Don’t pressure them into choosing their careers you want them to have
Final Thoughts
Lastly, don’t be so harsh in the development of your child’s confidence. Give them time to understand and progress. Make yourself involved but don’t try too hard. The tips mentioned above will help you connect and bond with your children. And, will also help build an independent, confident, and responsible personality of your kid.
